For the better part of five decades, I have worked with foster
parents, which California has now re-branded as resource parents. These
extraordinary, unique individuals have certainly left an indelible,
positive imprint on my life.
I am not sure I have the skills to
craft an appropriate expression of the gratitude I have for those who
have turned their homes and lives into sanctuaries, hospitals, safe
havens, classrooms and sometimes even battlefields for our children and
youth (and not without costs). But here I go:
Thank you for the
courage to welcome a stranger into your home with little to no knowledge
of who they are or what impact they will make.
Thank you for
being driven by the hope and faith that you can make a positive
difference in the life of a child or youth.
Thank you for
allowing your values and world views to be challenged by a young person
coming from a very different place in life than your own.
Thank
you for understanding the damaging impact of childhood trauma, and
making every effort to help foster children and youth heal.
Thank
you for putting your family stability, harmony and relationships at risk
for the sake of a child not your own.
Thank you for dealing with
disappointments by getting right back on the horse and marching full
steam ahead.
Thank you for taking in children and youth, at all
hours of the night, under crazy circumstances and much uncertainty.
Thank you for putting your lives “under the microscope,” in essence,
living in a glass house under the scrutiny of so many agency eyes.
Thank you for going to battle with schools, doctors, social workers,
probation officers, even neighbors, as an advocate for your kids.
Thank you for many nights of little to no sleep as you have served
as a comforter, consoler or watchdog.
Thank you for magically
making the limited reimbursement you receive stretch far enough to make
sure your children’s needs are met.
Thank you for being the
“Transporter”– running kids here, there and everywhere.
Thank you
for altering your home and lifestyle in order to comply with licensing
and safety regulations.
Thank you for working within a
challenging licensing system which can automatically assume you are
“guilty” of any complaint until proven otherwise.
Thank you for
participating in lots and lots of training, and also for seeking advice
when you need it most.
Thank you for traveling the “extra mile”
and more – over and over and over…
Thank you for laying out your
life story – the good and the bad– in plain view, in order to become a
foster parent.
Thank you for participating in team meetings,
individual education planning, case debriefings, attending court and all
of the extra activities that come bundled in with your foster child.
Thank you for your creativity and all the amazing, fun ideas and
activities you come up with to help your foster children.
Thank
you for filling out lots of forms, saving receipts, completing logs,
maintaining secure files and records, and conducting all of the other
“administrative” duties required of foster parents.
Thank you for
asking for emergency help and assistance when needed.
Thank you
for being the “first responder” to the multiple emergencies and crises
with your foster children.
Thank you for being a counselor, a
tutor, a coach, a friend and a role model to your children and teens.
Thank you for letting your home become “Grand Central Station” with
so many workers intruding into your space.
Thank you for being a
wonderful, willing team player.
Thank you for loving the
unlovely, healing the hurt, guiding the lost and correcting
inappropriate behavior.
Thank you for staying connected with your
foster children, long after they have left your home.
Thank you
for being one of the most significant, lifelong influences in the life
of a foster child or youth.
Thank you for being Mom or Dad when
you didn’t need to be!
By Jim Roberts
20 May 2016
https://chronicleofsocialchange.org/child-welfare-2/thank-foster-parents/18003
