Since it's founding in 1997, the CYC-Net discussion group has been asked thousands of questions. These questions often generate many replies from people in all spheres of the Child and Youth Care profession and contain personal experiences, viewpoints, as well as recommended resources.
Below are some of the threads of discussions on varying Child and Youth Care related topics.
Questions and Responses have been reproduced verbatim.
Listen to thisHi, I am a student in my final year of Child and Youth Care Diploma. I am
doing a project on issues in the professional practice, and have a question
that I would like to get some opinions on.
My question is, is it OK for Child and Youth Care workers to foster a youth once they are
ready to leave thefacilityyou work at? If you have any experience
fostering a youth in your home from where you work, can you please share
your opinion with me?
Thank you.
Becca
...
I recently had a youth exit care right on her 18th birthday. Now none of the workers fostered her after care because she had adult services in place, but there are 5 workers who now see her on a regular basis so that she has supports there when she needs then. Most of the time these youth leave care who never had supports in care. I think it really depends on the situation and who the youth and the worker are and how they are together. I had thought about fostering her because she had gone so far from where she came from when first entering care and the last thing i wanted was for her to be another stat of a yourh not making it after transitioning and ends up at the salvation army.
I think the problem here is with the age of transition, none of these youth to this day that i have worked with were able and ready to take that step of independence. Especially when they have been catered to the whole time in care. The youth that left our care said it is very hard for her. No incentives or money every week.
Catherine Titarniuk
...
Hello Becca,
I would caution you to examine your intentions very closely before makinga
decision to foster a child whom you have been working with as a CYC. I am
sure that you mean well, and I have no doubt that you care about the youth
in question, however, working with a child in a professional capacity and
fostering a child are two very different relationships, and sadly, children
or youth in the care system often have very complex psychological and
emotional needs.
In addition, although it might not be true at all of this youth, many
children and youth in the care system are often very skilled at manipulating
others feelings and the youth in question might have recognised the
advantages of possibly being fostered by you. Again, we should never assume
or label a child or youth as manipulative, and the youth in question may not
at all be manipulative, but I would question whether as student, you have
enough experience yet to be making this decision.
Youth in the care system often have to learn how to manipulate situations
and people to their advantage in order to survive, and the youth you are
considering fostering might not be the same person you worked with once
he/she is being fostered by you. If you are willing to accept this, and
willing to work with the challenges that sometimes arise when fostering
children or youth, then this youth is a lucky person, and I would commend
you for making this decision.
Think long and hard; and I know that so many of these children and youth's
stories are heartbreaking, and sometimes I wish that I could adopt or foster
all of them, but as a professional, you need to examine your own personal
emotional boundaries before making such a big decision.
All the best, and keep up the good work.
Delphine Amer
...
My agency, as many others do, has very clear policies
about interacting with youth outside the residence. In this case,
fostering the youth would be a clear violation of these policies. I
personally wouldn't be comfortable fostering youth I work with as this can
result in blurred roles and boundaries. I do feel though, if one was
open to this they would need to be mindful of their agency's policies.
Best of luck in your project and studies!
Sarah
...
Hi Becca,
I don't think this works very well without the support
of the employing organization. There are multiple layers of
agency/worker/young person boundaries to navigate. However, there are times
when it may be the best and right thing to do.
James Freeman
...
Dear Becca
Every child deserves to have at least one adult who is crazy for them. This
adult could be you who perhaps should foster a child after they have left a
child care center. There are many factors to consider here. The relationship
that would have built between you and the young person plays a major role
here. I do not see anything wrong as long as there is an assessment by
Social Work practitioners to ascertain the suitability of this long term
union. This is merely my opinion and not at all based on my personal
experience.
Vincent Hlabangana
...
Hi Becca,
Have you looked into the ethics policy with the OACYC regarding this?
Additionally, there may be different policies inherent
in each of the agenices with respect to this issue.
Yes, I have fostered youth at one point in my career. I am not certain
what it is that you are wanting to know, what my experience was like?
I can honestly say that this was one of the most challenging experiences in
my career as a Child and Youth Care and now realize why it is so important to share this
responsibilty with another parent or partner. I did this on my own
with my then 8-year-old son, whatever was I thinking I am not sure.
The agency I worked for was new and did not provide a lot of supports.
Their understanding of trauma and attachment was limited so they often
misread the youth's behaviours as defiance and disrespect. I would
have expected the owners and partners of this agency to have a thorough
understanding of the needs and issues of youth in care before embarking on
such a venture. If you are interested, I wrote an article at the
completion of that "challenging" experience for the OACYC, titled " A girl
name Kelly". This article was two-fold: a cathartic release for me and
to bring to light the issue of multiple placements and the lack of viable
supports for youth in care.
Donicka
...
Dear Becca.
I know that it has been done before. Successfully as well.
My personal opinion is that although this is a very noble idea, it is NOT
such a good idea.
The question remains; where are you going to draw the line, how are you
going to choose between the young people, what criteria are you going to
use, if you have chosen say Betty, what about Andrea and so on and so on....
Best of luck with this very important and life changing decision!
Dawie Marais
...
Hi Becca
An interesting question. The responses stimulated my thoughts from
when I managed residential programs for children. I don't know you,
the child, or the program. These are just some thoughts that come to
mind. This is a quite lengthy response--it is a complex matter with great
risks for the child.
There are many reasons it is a bad idea, few that it miight be good.
The first has to do with relationships, the second with expectations,
another with issues associated with muliple placement syndrome.
When I began working with children and CYC's in residential programs, my
wife and I were already raising our own children. I soon recognized
differences. When children would curse, threaten, or attck me or our
staff, or smash something in the facility, it was not hard for me to handle
things professionally. I didn't get emotional. But I did not
have a professional relationship with my own children; similar behaviours
from them in my own home would have produced much different emotional
reactions, for sure, quite possibly affecting my overt responses.
As an employed CYC, you have responsiblities for all the children with whom
you work. Fostering one of them will affect your relationships with
the other children, as well as the relationships of other CYC's with the
children. Some children will fantacize about being 'rescued.'
"Why doesn't she (or another CYC) want to take me home? What's wrong
with me?" Or, "What's wrong with them that they don't want me?
They don't care. They're only in it for the money."
And expectations are important. When I hired staff, I quickly leanred
that those who came expecting only to help kids had difficulties making
adjustments when they found out the my boss was obsessed with the tidiness,
cleanliness, and repair of the facility and vehicles. Or that a
significant amount of their time would be spent recording and writing
reports and supervising chores. It's the same with the kids.
When we would have preplacement interviews and then admit a child right
after the interview, they often had trouble making adjustments. They
had come with vague expectations about the basketball court and the pool
table and the TV and video games and hanging out with other kids. Then
they found out that there were other expectations. No matter how
careful we were in setting realistic expectations in the interviews, it
didn't take unless we gave them a day or more to process the new
information.
Children who are going into a new foster placement have expectations.
So do foster carers. Children may expect more freedom and fewer
rules and 'consequences.' Foster carers may expect some gratitude and
cooperation. If people are significantly disappointed in having their
expectations fulfilled, things may break down. Relationships change
from professional to personal. For example, "You're not my momma" to a
staff is quite different from "You're not my mamma," to a foster carer in
her own home. And if the placement breaks down and the child has to
leave, then the child has two relationships destroyed--the relationship the
child had with a caring and significant professional, and the foster
relationship. Termination of a professional relationship can be
difficult, but it is a normal thing when a child is ready to move on.
Memories of it can serve children well into their future.
Termination of a personal relationship is devastating. The risks for
the child here are tremendous.
And children who have endured multiple placements have learned to approach
each new placement with fear on some level that it, too, might fail.
Knowing they can pose problems, children have to test the new relationship
to be sure the people will be there for them if they have problems.
They can't feel secure until they know for sure. So they test.
What behaviour is it that they cannot tolerate? Where is that line
that I dare not cross.
It's not a conscious process but preconscious. And in their
obessessive search, they find the line by crossing it. "You can't stay
here anymore. I can't tolerate that behaviour in my home."
John Stein
...
Catherine – Your thoughts really highlight that the
transition to independence is a process, rather than event, that has
elements at even the earliest stages of development.
James Freeman
...
Hello Catherine,
I believe they are trying to change the age to 21 here in BC as too
many of these youth – according to the stats – ended up homeless...
Advocacy is essential in those cases. The government and the politics alike
need to hear us on this...
Sandrine
