Vulgar bombs shatter civility
Dreaded F-word is noun, adjective, verb, interjection and a few other parts of speech
As Ralphie in the movie A Christmas Story said, it's the queen mother of dirty words. There was a time when a kid would spend the day with a bar of soap in his mouth after spewing what some, like Ralphie's mom, consider the most vulgar word in the universe. Today, the F-word is so commonplace, it's routinely overheard on campuses, in school hallways and on playgrounds. The initials ''WTF'' (what the F – – -) are printed and sold on T-shirts, coffee cups and water bottles. And the word is routinely used by members on social networking sites, like Facebook and MySpace.
The word, which can be used as a noun, verb and adjective as well as an interjection, is so mainstream that kids use it even when they're trying to pay a compliment to a peer.
''Ur so F – – – – – – cute,'' one area 15-year-old girl told a boy on Facebook.
Another teen wished a pal a ''happy F – – – – – – birthday.''
And, of course, many use it in the cruelest way when angry.
Adolescents who are members of the Beacon Journal's young readers group explained that some kids use it to appear cool. ''I remember going into middle school and the shock that came with it because everybody was swearing,'' said Mike Dolan, a 16-year-old sophomore at Stark County's Jackson High School, adding that sometimes kids use the word to rebel against their parents.
Just an expression?
Karen Freeman, one of the founders of Kenmore's First Glance, a
faith-based ministry that has about 500 kids as members, believes that
when people drop the F-bomb, they're not really thinking about the
meaning of the word, just using it as an expression. ''I think that
generally there is such a lack of morals in society that even if they
did think about the meaning of the word, it would not be considered
extremely offensive,'' Freeman said.
Some kids are experts at making their parents think initials like WTF mean something different if Mom or Pop spots them on their child's cell phone or in a chat message. In an episode of the ABC sitcom Modern Family, Phil Dunphy, the father character played by actor Ty Burrell, boasts about being so hip that he text-messages — using shortcuts like LOL (laugh out loud), OMG (oh my God) and WTF, which he thought meant ''why the face?''
Megan Elavsky, a freshman at the University of Akron and a member of the Beacon's young readers group, believes the use of vulgarity is a rite of passage. ''Profanity is often discouraged in youth, so these words become the forbidden apple as adolescents secretly say them among friends with no or few adults around,'' the 19-year-old said. ''Many believe it gives an appearance of maturity, or they believe it is part of the culture because it is so far integrated into most of American comedy and music.''
Some musical artists, such as Lil Wayne and Snoop Dogg, are known for frequently dropping the F-bomb in their lyrics. And if a movie is rated R, you can expect to hear it. Even Vice President Joe Biden was recorded using it during the recent signing ceremony for the health-care bill.
The obscenity is a very old word that has been considered shocking for centuries. In fact, its detailed history goes back only so far because publishers of dictionaries wouldn't allow the word in their books.
As seen on TV
There used to be a time, not all that long ago, when flipping
on the television equated an evening of family entertainment. Now the
content and language during prime-time hours can make parents and
children uncomfortable. Even if the word is bleeped out, viewers can
usually fill in the blanks.
The F-word is generally not permitted in broadcast TV, nor do you hear it on basic cable telecasts. Still, it pops up on premium cable channels like HBO and Showtime, said Beacon Journal popular culture writer Rich Heldenfels. The FCC can fine stations for airing the word in certain situations, but has usually been forgiving of spontaneous outbursts, such as someone accidentally using it during a live broadcast.
So what's a parent to do if your sweet young thing is dropping the F-bomb as often as the drunkard clinging to a bottle at the neighborhood bar? Dr. Fred Ziegler, visiting assistant professor specializing in school counseling at the University of Akron, said you should begin by setting a good example and removing the F-word from your vocabulary. In fact, don't swear at all around the kids. ''You set the modeling with your own language,'' said Ziegler, who believes most kids don't connect any meaning to the F-word.
Tell the children that profanity isn't welcome around the family or in the home. ''The only way you can get away with that is if you don't use it yourself,'' he said. ''It takes a conscious effort by the parent.''
Limiting the time a child (particularly a very young one) watches television is another good idea, the professor said.
Freeman and her husband, Mike, who is an Akron councilman, have two grown children, a teenager and 6-year-old Chloe. They are trying the same technique on their little one as they did on their older children. ''Chloe has to earn her TV tickets through practicing her piano. Then each ticket is good for a half-hour of TV or she can trade it in for cash to spend on things she wants. She is such a tightwad that she seldom uses them on TV,'' Freeman joked. ''So far, so good.''
Kim Hone-McMahan
11 April 2010
