Listen to thisWe have all been in one of those situations when everyone else thinks things are important and you find yourself wondering ‘so what?’ Like, “so what if she doesn’t come home on time? So what it I don’t respond? So what if I fuck it up?”
‘So what’ is an important question in our field – and not just as in the above examples. Like, for example, ‘So what would happen if I did this? Or that? So what should we do now? So what will make a difference here?’
‘So what?’, ultimately, is a reflective question – and reflection is an important part of our practice – see the 25 characteristics. Constantly wondering, letting our curiosity roam, engaging in the world of ‘so what?’ or perhaps more accurately, ‘what if?’ As in “what if I did this? Or what if I did that?”
Let’s go back to the original questions – like “so what if she doesn’t come home on time? “ Yes, really ‘so what?” Like ‘So what if she is in danger? So what if she hates us? So what if she does not feel safe here?” ‘So What?’, if we allow ourselves to be reflective, curious, wondering, can lead us to important, even life-saving, actions.
But let’s be honest here – ‘so what?’ is usually a statement of indifference. And I am just inviting us to experience our ‘so what?; differently. Perhaps the next time you find yourself saying ‘so what’ you can take it a little further with reflection. Like, ‘so what if I thought about this differently?’ ‘So what if I responded differently?’ ‘SO WHAT IF I REALLY CARED?’
Yup! That is what this is all really about. If you cared – really cared – would your response to your own ‘so what’ be different?
I think so.
‘So what?’ can be a dismissal, or it can be a challenge, an invitation, an orientation. The choice is yours – as it always is. So what kind of a person are you? So what do you think? Are so a ‘so what?’ as in dismissive or a ‘so what?’ as in curious?
Wondering and curiosity are characteristics of our CYC approach – call it ‘reflective practice’ if that works better for you. But whatever you call it ‘so what?’ resonates.
But ultimately it is about how we position ourselves – to be reflective, or maybe, dismissive. ‘So what?’ can be either – inclusive, wondering or dismissive as in ‘so what, who cares?’
Who cares? Well ultimately (because this is my editorial), I care! I care that you would make ‘so what?’ into a progressive, wondering, helpful question. One that comes down to something like, ‘so what would happen if I really cared?”
Let me end with this question …
SO WHAT?
