Our Children’s Children

Brian Gannon

When dentists, motor mechanics and lawn mowers go home at the end of their day they usually have the pleasure of knowing that their day’s tasks are over and done with. The tooth was filled, the motor car is repaired and the lawn looks great. Child and youth care workers aim for more distant goals. We know that it may be only next month – or next year – that we might have played a part in healing the pain, restoring functionality or helped to make life look good for the children in our program.

• We need the patience to know that we will not achieve instant results. We so often work with young people whose development has been derailed or who find themselves stuck in an emotional logjam, and it takes time to help with the loosening of hurts, fears and conflicts – and the rebuilding of vision and hope, and the restoration of growth and mastery.
• But we also need the sense of urgency to catch up with the inexorable passing of years so that coming developmental milestones can be approached with more confidence and ability. It is as though a young child has fallen from a train and we are wanting to get the child back on the train at the next station ... or at least, hopefully, at the one after that.

So, the dentist, the mechanic and the gardener fulfil their short-term goals today. We may only know that today’s work has proved effective when a child manages his middle childhood tasks reasonably well, or makes a fair showing at the work of early adolescence ...

It is a mark of his integrity and insight that Erik Erikson dedicated his landmark mid-20th century book Childhood and Society “to our children’s children”. There are those who would expect us to “fix” the children and youth in our programs by dinner tonight. Demand instant obedience and compliance. Tell them to get their act together right now or else ...

Today in our practice we will recognise that child and youth care tasks must be done thoroughly, carefully, and will take a little longer. But we will also know, with Erikson, that sooner rather than later our kids will themselves be parents and that before that day arrives, we have much to do. Their (yet unborn) children are also our children.

From: CYC Practice Hints III, pp5-6

Brian Gannon's Practice Hints are part of a collection published by CYC-Net Press, which you can purchase at http://press.cyc-net.org