Listen to thisSelf-awareness allows one to know more about self at a point in time and in turn affects how one “is” as well as “what one does.” In order to be self-aware, Child and Youth Care workers need a way to think about self. The self-awareness model presented allows Child and Youth Care workers to know their belief systems, to know how they operate, and understand how belief systems affect how they operate. Traps in training’ or in applying the self-awareness model are identified and briefly discussed.
Introduction
The School of Child and Youth Care has adopted a curriculum framework which specifies three critical components of education and training for front-line workers in Child and Youth Care: knowledge, skills, and self. In curriculum planning the self component is viewed as the learner being able to examine and understand how the knowledge and the skill areas of self are relevant for them, how the knowledge of self will be integrated into what they already know, and how the skills for knowing and changing self will be evidenced in their Child and Youth Care practice.
In order for learners to examine, understand, and integrate self they need knowledge about self and how it works; they need skills in reflecting and changing self; and they need to integrate this knowledge and these skills in their Child and Youth Care practice. Once the knowledge about self and how it works and the skills of reflecting on and changing self are integrated into one’s daily Child and Youth Care practice, one can be responsible and accountable for one’s child care practice. This paper discusses self, a self-awareness model, and issues that emerge in training self and self-awareness.
Self and Self-Awareness
When we are approached with the request “tell me about yourself’ most of us readily launch into descriptions of our roles, physical appearance, likes and dislikes, statements about family circumstances, and so on. While the definition of ”self’ seems self-evident (pun intended!) most of us are unclear when asked to define it. Free association about the concept of self results in varied images: growth, change, insight, struggle, reflective thoughts, consciousness, cognition, risk, ego, deliberate goals for self behaviour, how one effects other people, to mention a few.
In spite of self being an amorphous concept (lacking precise or commonly accepted meaning, West, 1982), many professions and trainers of professionals argue that being oneself and having self-awareness is critical in professional practice. The claim usually made is that more self-present and aware professionals are more effective. While such claims enjoy remarkable consensus they have not been substantiated by empirical evidence.
While the empirical evidence for such claims is lacking, Wicklund’s (1979) careful review of the research on self argues for three implicit principles about the workings of the self and self-awareness:
Inherent in these principles is that self and awareness of self must become the object of one’s attention before self can affect functioning. Another way to put it is that the self comes into play when one’s attention is turned inward (Wicklund, 1979). This does not mean to imply that self-awareness insures better functioning but rather that self awareness insures awareness of functioning which in tum allows for intention toward functioning.
“Being” Aware In Child and Youth Care
It is necessary to make a distinction between self-awareness and “being” aware. Self-awareness models and definitions have tended to propose self-awareness as primarily, if not solely a cognitive process during which one accesses accurate, complete, reliable and accessible, self-relevant information. Such information is usually about one’s beliefs and values, one’s goals and aspirations, one’s perceived characteristics, and one’s impact on others. The nature of such a process is one that allows explanation, justification, even evaluation of self. However, it seems a more desirable state or enduring dispositional trait to be able to show up, to be present, or to function in knowing all that makes a person be what they are being at any point in time. Being aware as a state is to act in knowing what is; to be present in that knowing, and taking that presence into action. This kind of “being” aware or being in a state of awareness allows for the kind of presence in life that perhaps few comprehend, never mind experience. When one is “being” aware there is a multi-level knowing that captures one’s perception of the reality underlying the phenomena and conditions of the time. This heightened perceptivity allows for a presence of self that enhances any kind of relationship.
It is this kind of awareness, a way to be, not a post hoc analytical cognitive analysis, that is desirable in the Child and Youth Care therapeutic relationship. Because Child and Youth Care practitioners work with people daily, their jobs require them to know where the client is and what is happening for the client in their present context. To know about the client requires being aware of self since the client only exists out of one’s self experience of the other person. Therefore when one is not “being” aware of oneself one is not being there for the client. Put another way, the presence of self and action of self comes into operation only when one’s attention is turned inward, and until or unless that happens, there is no self to be present; when there is no self present there is no other present either!
It is necessary to appreciate that when speaking of “being” aware it is multilevel, multi-faceted, and interactional. Because of our mental faculties and processes one may only focus or speak on one dimension at a time but our processes are systemic and work for us systemically. For example, when one sees one does not stop hearing; when one tastes one does not stop seeing. We can process many things at once and therefore know many things simultaneously as well as accumulatively. In the realm of being aware it means that one can experience and be aware of different feelings, numerous thoughts, and set of actions at the same time.
Being Aware Model
The self-awareness challenge for Child and Youth Care practitioners is to be in a state of awareness when working with children and youth. To cultivate a state of awareness requires a way to think about self as a way of being. The following self-awareness model posits that self is a combination of being/presenting one’s thoughts, feelings, and behavioural acts out of one’s construction of reality or world view (belief system and life position). The model is intended to guide child and youth practitioners in their practice of being aware, subsequently more present in Child and Youth Care practice.
The model has two primary constructs: belief systems and style. Belief systems are composed of beliefs, values, and ethics.
Taking each aspect of the belief system at a time, beliefs are those tenets or set of tenets that a person holds as true Beliefs represent the information one has about the object or phenomenon (Fishbein & Ajzen, 1975). For example belief statements about children might include:
Belief statements are true because one holds them as true. It is necessary to make a distinction between belief (what a person holds as true) and fact (what science holds/declares as true because it meets scientific requirements) and agreement (another person holds the same tenet or set of tenets as true also). The point here is that when one holds something as true, it may as well be true. People will act as if it is true because for them it is! In other words each person’s reality is subjective reality and may be irrespective of the objective reality.
Values are those tenets or set of tenets that are held as important. Value statements of children might include:
Value statements are statements that refer to a person’s feelings toward and subsequent evaluation of some object or phenomenon. They reflect an assessment of worth. Inherent in value statements are implicit beliefs. Often value statements are made but may not reveal the inherent belief. For example, “I like children” is a value statement and behind that statement may be numerous beliefs about children such as those beliefs listed previously.
Ethics are standards or rules that are used in one’s daily life to live by or guide how one operates. Ethics are conations and reflect behavioural intentions for action. Ethics or standards with regard to children might include:
Ethics are rules, standards, or guidelines and are inherently tied to beliefs and values. One operates or intends to operate from his or her own rules. Therefore, even when one finds oneself doing something that one does not understand, one is probably playing by a higher order rule or meta rule tied to something more important and tied to a more critical belief. For example, if one believes that children must be given the space to function vigorously and at the same time one impinges or constrains their vigorous activities, a competing rule might be to respect the property and space of others. In this case respect for the property and space of others is more important (therefore more valued) than allowing vigor in children. These competing values go back to a critical belief such as one’s property and space is a manifestation of self.
In the model, style refers to one’s presentation of individuality or essence in being. Self is evidenced or manifest through one’s style which in turn is manifest by thoughts, feelings, and actions. Therefore, in order to evidence self or how one is being at any point in time it is necessary to access thoughts, feelings, and acts. Style represents the actual behaviours or behavioural presence of self. “This is wrong, it’s a nice day, children are wonderful” are thoughts. Thoughts are tapes or statements in the mind and may be stated or unstated. Feelings are emotions such as fear, hope, sad, happy, upset, hesitant, good, and so on. They too can be stated or unstated. Acts are the process of doing or operating. Acts are things like talking, running, baking, writing, studying, driving the car, and so on. At any point in time one thinks, feels and acts. All three behaviours are present. At this moment the reader is thinking, feeling and doing. For example, when
Act: I eat an ice-cream
Feel: I feel good
Thinking: I deserve this!
While style is the representation of self (what one thinks, feels, does) a factor that makes self an amorphous concept is time. There is the self in the moment, there is the self generally speaking, there is the old self (who one used to be) and there is the new self (who one is becoming). At any point in time one has beliefs, values, ethics and presents oneself in terms of thoughts, feelings, and acts. It is further complicated when one considers the William James’ aspects of self (material, social and spiritual) along with the dimensions of the model, remembering that they are all interacting and accumulative. Think of James’ aspects of self as self dimensions, e.g., “material self’ representing what one has and personal characteristics, ”social self’ representing status and social attributes and “spiritual self’ representing the intelligence and immaterial aspects of the self.
A final concept which helps the understanding of self is the concept of “position.” Position represents our configuration of self in terms of any time dimension. It integrates the beliefs, values, and ethics and represents the self’s position or the place where the self is coming from at a point in time and/or across time.
While positions are evidenced by thoughts, feeling and acts, positions are postures of the self; it is the way one constructs the world which makes a preposition or thesis of the self at the same time; positions are bottom line statements of one’s being or essence of who one is. They are constructions of one’s reality which are constructed from one’s reality and they serve one by maintaining that reality. The positions account for behaviours and sets of behaviours across settings and circumstances. The actual thoughts, feelings, and acts are reflecting the relevant beliefs, values, and ethics which emanate from our physical, social, and spiritual components.
Using The Model
It is critical to remember at this point that the model is a way to think about self, a way to have understanding in the moment so as to be truly present. Without the ability of the mind to bend back on itself there would be no thinker of thoughts, no doer of deeds, no feeler of feelings and, therefore, no such thing as self. The thinking about self is not the self, rather it is the mechanism that one has to know self. That is why models for thinking about self are necessary and therefore useful for becoming aware of self-therefore becoming and being self. Bernadette Roberts (1984) has pointed out that while the self is real like any scientific information it is provisional at best subject to change and in the end, utterly perishable! Child and youth care practitioners who have seen children’s self-concepts built, twisted, bolstered, and shattered know of what she speaks!
This model allows primarily for a way of thinking about self. It allows for heightened awareness on dimensions such as presentation of self: “how am I presenting right now, how do I feel, what am I thinking, what am I doing?” Secondly it allows for being aware of beliefs, values and ethics that account for that presentation of self. Thirdly, it can be used to see what general positions show up and how they are held in place. Finally the model can be used to “crack” a behaviour or a constellation of behaviours that are not understood.
To exemplify, using the model, let’s take a case of not understanding a behaviour. The behaviour is smoking:
Act: Smoking cigarettes
Feelings: Relaxed, fun loving
Thought: l hate smoking, why am I smoking, this tastes awful.
Notice the contradiction between the thoughts and the acts and feelings. It will be necessary to look at beliefs, values, and ethics with regards to smoking and any competing beliefs, values, and ethics that may account for the contradiction. The contradiction is a function of what is unknown to the person at this time and can be “cracked”. A first round reveals the following:
Beliefs: Smoking is unhealthy, tastes and smells bad.
Value: Smoking is bad for you.
Ethic: One should not smoke.
Once again, there is the contradiction. A second round turns up some awareness:
Beliefs: Smoking is social, non smoking is anti-social. If there is a smoker around you always have an understanding friend. Being social is what life is all about.
Values: lt’s important to be social. It’s important to have understanding friends.
Ethic: Smoke and you will have understanding friends.
Looking more closely at this person’s behaviours, particularly social behaviours, a theme emerges. There is a pattern of smoking and socializing; the two go together. While health is important, being social is more important; while school is important, being social is more important; while church is important being social is more important. The pattern suggests a positioning, a general stance that pervades more than one set of activity. The position is BEING SOCIAL IS LIVING. The general positioning drags smoking in with it since the belief is that being social and smoking go together.
Traps To Avoid
When learning, applying, or training others in applying the model be sure that beliefs are beliefs and that values are values. Putting “it’s true that” or “it’s important that” does not a belief or value make! In other words if one says “I believe that women are as important as men” this is really a statement of value. Be sure to examine the statements for real meaning or intended meaning, not just form.
It is necessary in applying the model to make accurate distinctions between beliefs, values and ethics in the belief systems and distinctions between thoughts, feelings and acts in behavioural style. Awareness begins by creating critical and useful distinctions because new distinctions create possibilities which were not understood or realized.
Start where it is comfortable and comes easily. The model is multi-faceted and interactional. There is no correct or best place to start in order to be “aware.” Some begin with values, some start with ethics. The aspects of the model all go together and to have awareness it is necessary to work through the model across all of its components. Usually people find it easier to begin with the actual behaviours: thoughts, feelings and acts. Sometimes underlining key words in the behaviours prompt awareness or discovery of beliefs, values and ethics.
Remember that awareness is for awareness sake since it represents being who you are. Having awareness brings with it more of you, subsequently more presence of yourself and others. While this is the “upside” of awareness, a word of caution about pushing for awareness!
Our constructions of reality serve us very well-remember who makes them up! Sometimes our constructions have deceptions in them as for example when beliefs and values are founded on misinformation or the information is distorted to suit the reality wanted! Under these circumstances, probing for awareness requires an uncovering or stripping away of deceptions. While this can be powerful and freeing, it can be confronting and painful. It is therefore necessary to take care in discovering awareness and to provide a safe environment for self-awareness discoveries.
References
Fishbein, M., & Ajzen, S. (1975). Belief attitude, intention and behaviour: An introduction to theory and research, California: Addison-Wesley.
Roberts, B., (1984). The experience of no-self. Boston: Shambhala Publications Inc.
Sklare, G., & Cunningham, N. (1983). Application of self-as-a-model in graduate and undergraduate counsellor training. Canadian Counselor, 17, (4),164-171.
West, L.W. (1982). Reflections on self awareness. Canadian Counsellor, 16(3), 153-161.
Wicklund, R.A. (1979). The influence of self awareness on human behaviour. American Scientist, 67, (2), 1987-193.
From: Journal of Child and Youth Care, Vol 4, No.1, 1989, pp33-41
