Listen to thisThe hope was to link many different strands of feeling, of values, of the children's established relationships with the teachers who took part and our other adults, of their family situations, of knowledge and understanding, of our link with the rest of nature; and make one meaningful experience of it all in an atmosphere of reassurance and trust.
We began by studying and painting animals and their young, and some of them were lucky enough to see calves being born on our farm. This is a moment when one really senses a child's depth of feeling. They read and wrote stories and poetry; some of this was based on Louis Macneice’s poem Prayer before Birth, and they wrote on what the unborn child would ask from life. Some even tried to express the feelings of security of the baby in the womb. When they drew out their family trees, some of the adopted children and step-children were able to explain something of what they felt about their origins. We found out how family characteristics are passed on from one generation to the next. The boys researched into and recorded the bodily development of boys and girls, and so we had to go into the question of why people may wait so long before marriage. What other development is needed beside that of the body? What is the best age for engagement and marriage? How does one choose wisely whom to marry? What is “falling in love"? The outlook and approach of the boys” different families was strongly reflected in their work, and gave our adults many openings for individual help. The overspill of the boys” interest in all this drew many of our other adults in as the boys asked questions or showed their work and drawings.
A lifesize cut-out figure of a mother was made which could open, and over nine weeks of school term “she" went through her nine-months” pregnancy; each week a different boy drew and cut out a larger womb and embryo to fasten on, with the help of a book by G. L. Flanagan, The First Nine Months of Life (Heinemann). We chose a boy’s and a girl’s name for it, recorded its growth, found out about National Insurance Benefits and welfare foods, planned what to buy for it, and talked about breast and bottle feeding. It was vital to the success of this project that it should convey the wonder and excitement of the beginning of life, and the looking-forward to a wanted baby which their own families had not often furnished. It was very much part of the project that our children already knew the Lampen family and our other teachers and their wives, and could feel these people were sharing something out of their own deep experience with them. It even played a part that little Clare Lampen, then aged three, used to come into class sometimes, and sit at one side, listening and doing her drawings. One of our friends, a doctor and a mother, came in one day to answer questions; and with the help of our local Health Department, we saw the film “To Janet, a Son" which shows two actual births. (We were surprised to learn that we were the first school in our area, girls” or boys”, to ask to see it).
When this so-called “difficult" subject is approached in this way, it is found not to be difficult at all; so long as the teacher has the right outlook, is sensitive enough to recognise what is needed and being asked, and not afraid to respond accordingly. He or she must also be able to know when one child is distressed or put in a conflict; and then it calls for skill to ease him off and straighten things out, either in the group or separately “and when necessary bring in more skilled help. When the difficulty for one child is not too deep-rooted, the rest of the group can often help; the natural way in which most of the boys responded to the project helped one or two to see that the image of something “dirty" in what we were doing did not truly apply to something of such beauty and value. A lot of children's reactions have been strongly coloured by the secrecy and twilight the adult world has imposed on the subject. When our friend the doctor was asked, during her first discussion with the children, “Can homosexuals have babies?", it showed these newish children knew that every question would be answered honestly and easily; if they wondered, they had a right to know. This did not lead to an excessive interest in matters surrounding reproduction; as the project went on, things fell in line for the boys. This was a natural part of life. Particularly after the film we felt a growth in the respect and understanding of our boys towards women. The good example of our housemothers played a most valuable part in this.
