Listen to thisMark Krueger: Last month Molly Weingrod, a youth, wrote about silence, a central theme in our study of moments with youth. This month we present examples of another theme, rhythmic interaction. In the 1992 edition of the Journal of Child and Youth Care Work, Henry Maier wrote “Have you noticed when two people jog, dance or toss a Frisbee in rhythm, they seem to experience momentary bonding and a sense of unity “Rhythmicity provides a glue for establishing human connections ..." (p. 7).
In the following three stories Quinn Wilder an experienced youth worker shows us rhythmic interactions in the contexts of daily relationships, activities, and struggles of youth work.
* * *
"Hey, What’s that?"
A boy points at the drum sticks I’m holding in my hands.
"Drumsticks," I say. “Wanna learn how to play?"
"Right now?" His eyes light up with excitement.
"Yeah, we’re going upstairs to play, wanna come?" He eagerly shakes his head up and down.
He and about four others follow me in a line as I walk towards the back of the huge rec room. I’m heading towards some doors but I have no idea how to get upstairs. I step sideways to get next to the youth behind me, and ask him if we can get upstairs by going this way. He nods his head. I’m not sure if he understood me. We get to a door and open it and enter the small room, and there’s a group of young girls playing a boom box and learning a dance routine. We exit and some of the youths who were following me start asking how to get upstairs. One older boy tells me its “over here,” towards the front of the center, and we head over there. By now, there’s about 8 of us, and we go upstairs where the executive director is unlocking the door.
"You’re locked in with them now," he says to me with a smile, and he heads back downstairs.
We walk through a large, empty room, through a cage door, and into another room with a desk and a linoleum table. I show them some drumming beats and techniques, give them each a pair of sticks, and we play on that table for about 25 minutes. I say goodbye and some of them ask me if I’m going to come back for more drumming. I tell them I might be able to come back sometime but it depends on whether my drum program at another youth center works out. I wave to the executive director across the room, the drummers filter back into the activities, and I head out the door.
* * *
We pull in to the parking lot of the park, and as soon as the car stops two of the boys jump out and head for the river.
"Where are you guys going?" I ask.
"My Uncle took me here once to fish," one of the boys shouts to me across the parking lot. Me and the youngest brother head in their direction. I arrive to find the brothers standing on a trail by the river, watching people fish. Their eyes were lit up with excitement, and I think to myself that if I get to see them again I will try to take them fishing.
"Do you want to play the game I was talking about?"
"Yeah," the oldest replies.
"Lets go find a good place," I say, and we quickly walk together across the parking lot, talking about fishing. We cross the park road together and arrive at a small clearing between several trees. Its a bright, sunny, hot day.
"This place looks good, lets just play catch for awhile," I say, and I toss the frisbee to the oldest brother. He jumps up into the air and catches the frisbee, lands and looks at it with a surprised expression on his face, and throws it to one of his brothers. We play catch for awhile, me leading them so they have to run to catch it.
"Ready to play Ultimate Frisbee?" I ask.
"Yeah," the youngest responds.
"You can't run with the frisbee, and to score a point you have to throw it so it hits this tree."
The boys start out hesitant, forgetting not to run with the frisbee, figuring out their strategies, but very quickly they are scoring points, diving for the frisbee, jumping up and down screaming for the frisbee, and laughing at each other.
"Wanna take a break?"
We all simultaneously drop to the ground, smiles on our faces, exhausted, lying on the grass, catching our breath.
"Ya like it?" I ask them. They nod their heads enthusiastically.
* * *
The strong smell of must that was always there filled the large rec room of the unit. Taking up space was an old TV, a coffee table, some plastic chairs and the usual “special” brown furniture made to stand up to use by at-risk youth. The girls were all sitting around a short, round table with me in our plastic chairs as I led an unusual group. I was leaving the unit, quitting the job for grad school, and this was my second-to-last day.
"What do we have to do this stupid group for?"
"What do you have in those bags?"
"These are surprises. I’m going to take them out, let me say something first though once everyone is sitting down and can hear me. Okay, you know already that tomorrow is my last day here. I am going back to school so I can become a social worker. Someday, you too might be saying goodbye to people you care about so you can go to school or take on a new challenge in your life. “
"Yeah, so what’s in the bags?"
"I have something I want to give each of you before I leave."
(I go around the circle of girls, taking an item out of the bag, describing its significance, and giving it to the girl.)
"And Vikki, we've been through a lot together here, and you’re going to get a new primary worker. So I wanted to leave you with something to help you get by. We all know how you can get loud and angry and how that’s gotten you in trouble, and you've gotten better at keeping yourself calm and speaking more softly in order to get treated with respect. I want you to do well after I’m gone, so I made you this."
(I take out a large cone made out of construction paper, with writing on it.)
"This is the Vikki Voice Controller, and when you start getting mad and you have to scream and yell at someone, just put the big end on your mouth, and it comes out quiet on the other end."
I smile, the other girls laugh and Vikki smiles and laughs as I hand it to her.
