So what?

“So what!” she asked, looking at me with curiosity, like I was something that had dropped in from another planet.

“So what?”

Good question. I learned a lot that day – like the importance of the question “So what?” I had always thought it was a challenge, a confrontation. But that day, I discovered it was actually a question – and a good one, at that.

“So what?”

“So what ... if we try this?”

“So what ... if it doesn’t work?”

“So what ... if you think that’s what’s good for me?”

“So what?”

Great question!

“So what?” you ask, as in “So what’s the point?”

And you see, that’s why it is a great question. And if we can think of it as a question, maybe we can let go of the “being challenged” feeling we have each time a young person or family member – or yes, even a team member – says “So what?”

So what’s the point? Re-framing, that’s the point. Making choices about how to see things. Deciding to be actively in control of self.

That’s so what.

And here’s another “So what”.

“So what would happen if we took this attitude in to all kinds of communications with young people and their families? So what would it be like if we assumed everything they said was really about them, and not about us? So, what would happen, do you suppose, if we let our selves give up the defensive position we often take when we are challenged (or at least experience ourselves as being challenged)?

So what would happen if we just adopted a “so what” position in our work?

Ah, so what?

Thom